I Don’t Run!

It was a lovely Saturday. There was a season of rain that made it unnecessary for me to water my outdoor flowers. I puttered around in my house and did Saturday kinds of things.  There was a baby shower for a friend at 4:30 in Dover, and I planned on attending.  Youngest Daughter was driving over from DC to attend as well, and I wanted to see her as well as celebrate her good friend’s expected baby boy.

It dawned on me that I had a package that needed to go to the UPS store in Dover – an Amazon return that was actually past it’s return time, but I checked with Amazon and it appeared that I could still return it.  However, that store closed at 4:00, so I decided to go a little early, take care of that and then go to the shower.

I had made 9 pie crusts the night before and put them into my refrigerator because it had gotten late and the bursitis in my right shoulder made it feel as if it wasn’t a good idea to roll them out just before trying to sleep.  The morning passed with usual speed, and suddenly, I realized that I had better get on those before it got any later. 

Certain Man, who had been traipsing in and out of the house, doing any of a number of important things, stopped at the counter where I was rolling out the crusts and said, “I’m going to the chicken house.  Before you leave, Just stop out at House #2 and let me know that you are leaving.”

I looked at the clock and said, “I need to be leaving in 45 minutes,” (thinking that maybe we could just say our ‘good-byes’ now and save me the trip to the chicken house).

“That’s fine,” he said, as he went out the door, “I’ll be around.”

I hurriedly finished the crusts, stashed them in the freezer, gathered up the gift that I had for the new baby, and got into better clothes. I had some new leather tie shoes that I save for good occasions, and even though they aren’t stylish, they are comfortable.  Because they are rather expensive, I had been trying to keep them dry so they will last longer.  Even though it had been so rainy, the day had cleared.  They were perfect for this outside baby shower.  I finally was ready, but I was, of course, running late. I backed our trusty minivan out of the garage and headed for the chicken house.  Oh, boy!  The ground was really squishy.  I could hear the water rolling off the tires as I drove in the grass up to House #2.  I certainly didn’t feel like getting out of the van with my good shoes.  So, I blew my horn a couple of times.  There was no response.  Sigh.  I guess that I would need to go to the door and holler.  I was NOT going to go all the way into that stinky chicken house when I was on my way to a baby shower.  No siree! If he didn’t answer, I would just go on my way.  I cautiously opened the door to the mini van and stepped out onto the very soft ground beside the main door to House #2, then up onto the muddy cement pad that goes into the chicken house and opened the door.  Pee-yew! This place does not smell like a party!  The lights were very dim and the nearly grown chickens were resting quietly.  This did not indicate that Certain Man was anywhere inside.   I stuck my head in a little way and looked.  And hollered.  There was no response. 

“Huh!  I know he said house two, and it’s getting later and later!”  I hollered again.  But there was no response.  “Well,” I decided, “I guess I will check over at House #3 before leaving.”  I stepped back, shut the door and turned to step back to my van.

It wasn’t there!  IT WASN’T THERE!!!  

I thought my heart would stop. I looked around frantically and saw my van, ambling under its own power about a hundred feet away, headed aimlessly towards House #1.  I had forgotten to put the simple thing in park!

I do not run.  Pretty much because it doesn’t go well for me.  I’ve been known to tell my family that if they see me running, they had better run, too, because something terrible is about to happen.  I think the last time I exerted any amount of speed was when I was trying to save 2-year-old Liam from getting onto the road back in 2013. You can read that story here: https://maryannyutzy.com/2013/08/27/that-shadows-fall-on-brightest-hours/ (I actually thought about that at this moment!  Isn’t it peculiar how things go crashing through a person’s head at times like this).  I think I was trying to find an excuse to not do what absolutely needed doing and demanded doing immediately!  Oh, where was Certain Man when I needed him?  Except, wait a minute!  I didn’t want him to know about this – at least not at this juncture.

I started off hurriedly in the same direction that the mini van was headed.  I had shut the door when I got out, so I knew that somehow, I had to get to the van, open the door, get inside, and get it stopped before it hit anything.  I didn’t seem to be gaining on the vehicle at the present speed, so I tried to turn things up a notch.  The ground was very soggy, and my poor shoes squished in protest.  I saw that the van was getting slower and as I hurried, I watched it inch its way into the middle of a very large, deep puddle between the two chicken houses, and stop.  In retrospect, I realize that it probably was not going any farther, but at the moment, all I could think was, “It’s going to take off any second.  I need to get there! As in NOW!!!”  I thought dismally of my resolve to keep this pair of shoes clean and dry, and marched bravely into that very large deep puddle.  By the time I reached the van, I was in water up to my ankles.  I yanked open the door, reached across and put the gearshift into park and pulled my feet, first one and then the other into the van after trying to “dog-shake” the water off before setting them inside.  I sat briefly, relieved that there was no damage to the vehicle, then put it back into drive and inched my way out of the very large deep puddle, and hoped not to get stuck on top of everything else. 

I sat on the chicken house lane at the end of the chicken houses and looked at the time.  I decided that I would try to find Certain Man in House#3 but that I would make it short.  I motored around the end of House #2 and drove down to the main door of House #3.  I made sure the van was in park and blew the horn, then repeated the whole “Poke my head in and holler” business.  I thought I saw him down the house a bit, but didn’t know if he heard me.  I decided that I was just going to go on without talking to him, and began to turn the van around when he poked his head out of the door, cheerful as all get out.  I decided that I wasn’t going to waste time telling him my story until later.  I told him that I really needed to get going if I was going to make the UPS store, and he told me to “Get goin’ then!”  So, I did!

I looked at my shoes and thought about going into the house to dry them off, but they actually looked none the worse for their trauma, and there were no water marks on my hosiery, so I decided to not worry about it and go to the UPS Store (I actually made it with about 5 minutes to spare) and then on to baby shower.  Which is exactly what I did and had a wonderful time.  My feet didn’t even squish in my shoes when I walked, and in time, the shoes seemed to dry out just fine.

And so, I tell you again.  I don’t run!  And if you see me attempting to run, after you make sure that nothing is chasing me, would you please check to see if I’m chasing something that is needing to be caught?  And chase it for me?

I’d be grateful!


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