A year and a half has passed. . .
For most of the first year
My hands were on “automatic.”
My mind was on “pause.”
And my heart was on “broken” and “numb.”
And then one wintry day, A Christmas Carol
And the ageless story of a Baby,
Come to carry my sorrows,
Broke through my Decembered grief.
And Spoke Life. And Healing. And Comfort.
To what I thought was the coldest grief of all.
And I believe the healing will go on,
Though now I’m feeling it all again.
The “doing because I must”
The paralysis in my brain.
The silent wounded heart.
The scars in the ground belonging to people I love
So much to rejoice about —
A well-fnished course.
A son home from a far country.
A marriage proposal on the beach.
Youngest Daughter’s new job.
Bible School in full and happy swing.
Enthusiastic, energetic teachers and helpers.
And I do rejoice.
But looking in the mirror this morning,
I see the eyes looking back
And am startled by the sadness.
Something bigger than the joy
Is sitting on my mind and heart.
And my hands feel like they
Weigh a ton.
This will never do!
The LORD is here.
In every crazy, mixed up minute.
In every sorrow, burden, worry.
He is Here!
He is here to keep His promises.
He is here to bear the burdens.
He is here to never go away.
He is here to stay my restless, weary heart.
He will do it!