Tuesday ponderings

The days have been a stretch for this old grey mare.   I think I am feeling my age more than I ever have.  With Mama sick, and the days full of deadlines and details, what I have wanted most was some privacy to cry and pray and refocus.

This morning, in my Bible reading, I came across some notes in the margin of my devotional Bible that I had put there two years ago.  The reading was from Psalm 46: 

 1 God is our protection and our strength.
       He always helps in times of trouble.
 2 So we will not be afraid even if the earth shakes,
       or the mountains fall into the sea,
 3 even if the oceans roar and foam,
       or the mountains shake at the raging sea.

 4 There is a river that brings joy to the city of God,
       the holy place where God Most High lives.
 5 God is in that city, and so it will not be shaken.
       God will help her at dawn.

The markings in my margin have some water damage — It was an intense time in 2009, right about now.  This is what it says:

“. . .even when a knee is slow to heal, a favorite uncle dies, a mama has a blood clot and the dream that was Baby Boo seems to be a long time coming to our lives . . .”

I had had surgery on my left knee, hoping to keep it from a replacement.  My Uncle Luke had taken his journey HOME to Heaven, and my mama was in the hospital with a pulmonary embolism.  The hardest thing was that the baby that was to be our grandchild was about two months later being born than expected, and there were some serious questions as to whether she would be allowed to be adopted by Jesse and Christina.

And the knee didn’t heal.  It had to be replaced.  Uncle Luke wasn’t coming back, and there is no earthly “fix” for that.  But there has been healing.  Mama got better from that blood clot and did very well for a good long time.  And she continues to get better from this hospitalization, too.

And the dream that was “Baby Boo” is our very own Charis Nicole.  Only God could have orchestrated such an incredible gift to our family. 

And in the reading of these timeless verses, I once again acknowledge that I do not need to fear. 

God is our protection and our strength.
       He always helps in times of trouble.



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13 responses to “Tuesday ponderings

  1. and now my keyboard is at risk for water damage. i am celebrating His protection, help and strength,and the gift of Charis Nicole with you.

  2. amen 🙂 so hard to live out, but so true

  3. Troubles and cares come easily into our lives don’t they. “God is our protection and our strength. He always helps in times of trouble”. We know this but sometimes it gets crowded out of our minds.

  4. Amen and Amen. Isn’t it wonderful that God gave us the gift of “hindsight” to see His hand, His love, and protection all along the way. What I am looking forward to in heaven is understanding it ALL! What a day that will be. =)

  5. Jesus is your tender Shepherd, lovingly nurturing you, providing for your needs.  When you hurt, He hurts for you.  Oh how much He loves his very own sheep.  Keep trusting, keep remembering how He’s already shown His working in your life.  I am tearing up FOR you, too.  I love you and am praying for you, sweet friend.  Thanks so much for opening up your heart and sharing in such a vulnerable way, and especially for sharing the verses.  We all NEED HIM so very much.  Please give sweet mama a hug from your xanga friends! 

  6. Oh dear.  There goes my comment, hidden by the white background.  But, I’m sure you can still read it in your feedback records, dear one.  ((love you))

  7. Isn’t the Lord so precious to give us reminders of His faithfulness just when we need them most!?!  He is so good to us, even when we are not seeking His goodness – and when we are, as you were, He rewards us well!

  8. The Lord never leaves us nor forsakes us. May the Lord bless you and the family as you continue to be with your Sweet Mama. May she continue to get stronger so that she can come home. In order to read the comments in the white space, just highlight it with the cursor and the letters turn blue so that you can read it here on this very page. Hold down left mouse button while moving over the space and you’ll see words come into view.

  9. Oh I know, I know. So very, very true. WHY CAN’T I REMEMBER THAT I DO NOT NEED TO FEAR????? So many things I feared in the last two years were worked out by the Lord with impeccable timing. Why do I think for one moment that He might not be there for the things I still fear? Thank you for sharing your reminder.

  10. God is always with us.  With joy and gratitude we can feel Him near.  It sounds like you have much to be grateful for even in times of trial.

  11. You and your mother have been in my prayers. God is always good, and His grace is without measure. May He give you endurance as you tirelessly care for those depending on you at this time.  ~ Love you.

  12. reminds me of the song “All the way my Savior leads me what have I to ask beside, can I doubt His tender mercy who thru life has been my guide?Heavenly peace divinest comfort here by faith in Him to dwell!  For I know whate’er befall me Jesus doeth all things well…All the way my Savior leads me cheers each winding path I tread, gives me grace for every trial feeds me with the living breadTho my weary steps may falter, and my soul athirst may be, gushing from the rock before me, LO a spring of joy I see….All the way my Savior leads me O the FULLNESS of His love!  Perfect rest to me is promised In my Father’s house aboveWhen my spirit, clothed immortal, wings its flight to realms of day this my song thru endless ages, Jesus led me all the way…..”Thanks friend for your warm words of cheer……….on FB, so very true. 

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