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It’s been anything but a quiet weekend at Shady Acres.
Certain Man has been in a fit of getting things done around here.  On Saturday morning, he propped a ladder up against a rather precarious limb to trim several other limbs from the Thornless Honey Locust Tree that were getting too long.  While he had the ladder out, he propped it up against the side of the house to fix the topmost gable end of the house where a tree had bumped against the soffit and pulled up the roof and damaged the siding.  He scares Certain Man’s Wife spitless when he does these things.  CMW is very uncomfortable with a man on a ladder perched anywhere that is higher than her head.  She was in the middle of doing the usual Saturday “catch-up” laundry and baking bread, so she didn’t stand out there and hold the ladder or holler.  She didn’t figure there was too much that she could do, anyhow, with a ladder that is 30 feet long and a full grown man on the other end.  I guess she sorta’ thought that if it was gonna’ go, it was gonna’ go and she didn’t want to be there to see it happen.
He came down, then, eventually, with his mission accomplished and asked CMW if she had any more of the “Mr. Clean Erasers®” that have been found to be very effective in washing off siding.  Certain Man’s Wife happened to have a whole box of them from Sam’s Club, and he proceeded to inform her that since he had the big ladder up on the deck anyhow, he was going to wash the upper part of the house where the moss and green deposits had built up.  CMW got him a bucket of warm water and the dozen or so Mr. Clean Erasers®, he got himself a hook to hang that bucket upon and he set out to clean the house. Certain Man’s Wife went back to her bread.
In the middle of CMW’s periodic checking on Certain Man’s progress, the family cat, Tatters, who has been a part of the family for almost nine years, made a mad dash for the slightly opened door and disappeared under the deck.  This did not trouble CMW inordinately since she sometimes does get out, and seriously heads back inside at almost her first chance.
After a time, Middle Daughter and Youngest Daughter returned from the Festival at Central Christian School and the Hospital Fair at the Hospital where Middle Daughter works and set about to help their beleaguered parents.  Middle Daughter got up on the ledge of the roof and helped to wash the siding and Youngest Daughter helped CMW in the house.  No mention was made of the missing cat.
In the afternoon, Certain Man’s family headed out for the wedding of Eldest Son’s friend, Matt and his girl Dorothy.  It was a lovely wedding.  The bride was beautiful, the groom’s eyes were so full of love and happiness, The sermon was well done, the vows were traditional and sweet, there was not an unduly long wait between the wedding and the reception, and the food was excellent.
Certain Man’s Wife’s Sweet Mama sat with Our Girl Nettie and Cecilia whilst the family was gone, and when they returned, the almost first words were, “Have you seen the cat?”
Sweet Mama said, “No, I haven’t seen her at all.  She has been nowhere around.”
This was when Youngest Daughter realized that Tatters was missing.  “She’s gone for good,” she stated emphatically.  “I know that she is.  She will never come back!”  This was followed by a great treatise on people who didn’t watch properly, didn’t care whether the cat was out or not, and a great trembling of the lip.
Certain Man’s Wife didn’t share this view.  “She has always come back.  Don’t worry, Rachel.  She gets out alot, whether you know it or not, and she always comes back”
“But she comes back right away.  If she’s been gone all day, she will not come back.  She’s probably dead somewhere.”
Then the whole family got involved in the looking.  They looked in the basement, in all the bedrooms, in the side “dungeon” space.  No Tatters.   Middle Daughter, who is, by far, the most involved with this capricious animal, went up and down the road, calling and looking.  She got down and looked under the deck.  She went out and looked in the dog pen.  (We have an Australian Red Heeler, and he has killed many a cat that has ventured into his domain.)  No Tatters.  She and Certain Man went out to the barn where there are myriads of cats that have been dumped off here over the years.  There is a barn cat that looks like our Tatters, but when it ran away as fast as it could go, they knew it wasn’t her.
Certain Man’s Wife’s heart got increasingly heavy.  Usually, when Tatters has been gone for some time, CMW can go to the sliding glass doors and call her, and she will dive for the open doorway and slither past like a banshee is after her.  Though there were numerous callings made at all the doors, there was no sign of Tatters.  Midway through the evening, there was this thunderous descent from the upstairs by Middle Daughter.  She bolted through the family room and through the kitchen, past Certain Man’s Wife.
“Deborah!   Whatever is –”
“Sheppie is barking and I heard a cat scream!”  She threw over her shoulder as she pounded through the laundry room and out the back door. This set off a whole new round of looking for the cat;  Searching through the dog pen, getting down to look inside the dog house to see if the body of the unfortunate beast had been drug into the dark confines of the canine abode.  NOTHING!!!
And so the evening passed with no sign of the missing cat.  Just before going to bed, Certain Man’s Wife stood again at the darkness of the sliding glass doors and called for the furry little beast that has lightened many a heavy heart over the last nine years.  “Lord, there are so many things out there that are heavy and sad.  People are dying without a Savior and there is earthquake and war and famine and cyclone.  A lost cat is pretty inconsequential in light of all the terrible things going on.  But could you watch over our Tatters tonight?  And if it is your will, could you bring her back to us?   But if she is hurt or suffering, could you just allow her to go quickly?  And would you comfort the hearts of Youngest and Middle Daughters?”
Morning came, bringing with it drizzle and cold.  “If anything will bring her back,” said Middle Daughter hopefully, “it is the rain.  She HATES being out in the cold and rain.”  But there was no sign of the missing cat.
“I just want some closure,” said Middle Daughter for the fourth time.  “We need to call the neighbors and see if they have seen her.  Maybe one of the barn tomcats chased her away.  She doesn’t have any claws so it would be difficult for her to defend herself.”
“Do cats fight to the death?” wondered CMW aloud.
“Not usually,” said Middle Daughter, “but usually if there is a fight, one of them will run away.  And if Tatters ran away, the tom could be keeping her from coming back.  She might have just gone to a friendly house and stayed.”
When Certain Man came in from the morning chores, CMW looked at him questioningly.  He shook his head.  “Nope, I didn’t see anything of her,” he said softly to CMW.
“Do you think she will come back?” Queried CMW.
“Nope.  I think she is gone for good.”
“That’s what I’m afraid of, too.”  Said CMW sadly.  “I think if she could come back, she would have by now.  I suspect that she is dead somewhere, or at least severely injured.”  CMW began to think about a cuddly little kitty or a cat that would be more friendly and less independent.
“NO!” Said Youngest Daughter.  “Tatters was the kind of cat I like.  She wasn’t so “needy” as some cats are.”
“NO!” Said Our Girl Nettie.  “I don’t want another cat.  I think it’s better not to have a pet in the house.”
“Alrighty then!” Thought Certain Man’s Wife.  She wasn’t going to ask Certain Man.  Back when Tatters had first appeared on the doorstep, he had been thoroughly against her staying.
“If you keep that worthless bunch of fur,” he was heard to say on more than one occasion, “you will have to call it ‘Daddy’ ’cause both of us can’t live in the same house.”
The pleas of his children, and their offer to help pay for some of the cat “needs” finally won him over, however, and he and Tatters entered into a guardedly peaceful co-existence, though “affection” would not be descriptive of their relationship.  In fact, CMW heard the words “Worthless bunch of fur” and “ugly fleabag” thrown about with random indignation.
Sunday morning was filled with the usual last minute church preparations, getting lunch into the oven, checking family schedules and such, and then it was off to church — but not without CMW looking intently one more time around the perimeter of the garage and flower gardens to see if maybe there was the familiar furry friend.
And so Sunday passed.  CMW took a nap while Certain Man prepared the sermon for the Communion Service in the evening.  And she dreamed mixed up dreams of cats that looked like Tatters in the dumpster with wild claws and teeth, and of injured cats in the grass.  And since she overslept there was a mad rush to get everything done before leaving for evening church.  She did call at the basement steps and the sliding glass one or two times, but was chided by family members.  “Mom, she’s gone.  You might just as well accept it . . . ”
There is nothing quite like communion at Laws Mennonite Church.  It is warm and personal and encouraging and strengthening.  There are always a number who hang around late and talk and fellowship long after the meeting is over.  Middle Daughter and Youngest Daughter went home fairly soon, but since Certain Man has a creed (The 11th commandment:  “Thou shalt not leave the church parking lot until there are only two cars remaining, one of which is thine own.”) it was over an hour before Certain Man and his wife had finished talking to good friends, cleaned up the communion remnants, and headed home.
As they pulled into the driveway, CMW commented about the number of cars parked around the circle and on the grass.  “It looks like the boys have some company,” she observed.  Youngest Son’s Girl had come home from college, and several of their friends had come to rejoice with them.
CM and CMW unloaded the van, and came into the house to be greeted with the words, “The cat is back!”
“What?”  “How?”  “Is she alright???”
Here Middle Daughter took up the story.  It seems that Youngest Son came into the back door to find her waiting patiently on the floor inside the entryway to get into the laundry room.  And of course there was no explanation for her whereabouts for the past 36 hours.  Youngest Son was mad because all the emotional energy had been wasted when she was “just in the basement.”  But Certain Man and his wife think she may have found a way to get from the crawl space to the outside, or that she may have eaten something when she was out and didn’t feel good for a while and just slept it off.  She seems a little subdued, maybe less energetic, but we cannot find any cuts or scratches or such.  Whatever happened, and where ever she has been, she has been welcomed with a great deal of affection and relief.  I am so glad that she isn’t somewhere injured or dying with no one to watch over her.

And then it occurs to me that there are plenty of humans out there tonight in that very circumstance —  dying.  With no one to watch over or care.

Do I seek them with the same heavy heart that I had when I was looking for my errant cat?

Do you?

Does anyone care?

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This e-mail came in a round about way to our family forum from someone with connections in China.  What an incredible answer to prayer for the many of us who have been praying!  Continue to keep this family in your prayers.


Chad called me from
Wenchuan a few minutes ago and wanted me to let you know that all is well with
them. They are living in a tent on the soccer field of the college there because
their building is damaged. Their house is still in good enough shape that he has
been able to go into it every day to sort of go through things and start packing
things up. They are basically just waiting till the road gets opened enough to
get a ride out…Chad said someone told him maybe 3 or 4 days but it could be
longer than that. Army trucks were able to get in through that road recently but
yesterday I heard that it had been closed again because of slides caused by
strong aftershocks. They have water and the basic things that they need, Chad
said it is sort of like they are living in a big refugee camp. He said that
everything is quite orderly around there with lots of army guys around making
sure people stay calm etc. Chad said it is very dusty around there because there
were major rock slides all around the area. He said it did rain some the first
evening and then all of the second day but since then it has been sunny.

 

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There is word on the

Praying for Chad, Jenny, Matthew, & Baby 
Facebook account

http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=26461184440

that there has been word from Chad and Jenny and that they
are okay. 

Lord Jesus, may it be so!

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China Earthquake

Could my Xanga Friends please pray for family members in the town of Wenchuan in the province of China that was hard hit by the earthquake?

Chad and Jenny Graber, and their little son, Matthew, are there. Chad is teaching at a college there, Jenny is expecting their second baby.  Their town is very devastated.  There has been no word from this little family.

Pray for their safety, yes, but pray more that they would be a source of hope and comfort to those around them.

And pray for my cousin, Ben, and his wife Carol, and the rest of their family as they wait for news from Jenny (their daughter) and her sweet family.

And as members of the Family of God, we should be praying for our brothers and sisters who have been affected by this disaster.  May we not sin by “ceasing to pray” for our troubled old world.

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Remember that terrible bread????

Just so you know, it is all gone from my freezer.

It became the stellar seasoned croutons
on a beautiful tossed salad
on the second course
of the main meal
last night
at the Jr. Senior banquet.

I cannot claim credit for their wonderful flavor.

One accomplished young cook,
namely Carmen Horne,
took that cubed up bread
and seasoned it
and toasted it
to perfection.

I promise you.
It did not
taste like donuts
when she was finished.

And my conscience is not fretting over the wasting of almost perfectly good bread.

What a wonderful solution to my problem.

Thank-you, Carmen and the Banquet Crew.

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Our Baby Girl is all grown up and going to Banquet!

AAA Banquet Tim and Rach 2
Her cousin, Tim, invited her many weeks ago, and she has been eagerly anticipating this night.

But then she got sick, and for a few days, it was a big question about whether she could even go or not.

But she recovered, and she was resplendent in her pretty dress:
AAA Banquet Tim and Rach
She is slouching here just a tiny bit so she isn’t taller than her escort —
(but he doesn’t care, and she shouldn’t either!)

I was already out at the school, working on supper,
and didn’t get to see the great goings on that involved betting ready..

Deborah did her hair, and it turned out nicely.
AAA Banquet The hair 3
(Although at this point, they both may have been wondering!)
Rachel has beautiful, long, long hair.  They decided to pin it up and then did the fall in curls.

It’s hard to worry too much when you are so looking forward to an evening.

AAA Banquet The hair 4
By this time, she seemed pretty sure it would turn out okay.

AAA Banquet Rachel and her daddy 2
Here she is with her daddy, just before leaving for the Banquet.
He is so proud of his girlie.
From the time when she was a toddler, and he would crawl around on the floor,
hiding behind the cupboards to leap out at her,
they have been best buds. 
If I didn’t know that it is so good for a teenager to be good friends with her dad,
I would be jealous!
(As it is, I am so very grateful.)

Shortly after this, he came to the school too,
and lent a much appreciated hand to the labor intensive evening.

Oh, boy!  Am I glad that is done!!!  I feel like my legs are made of stumps.
But then, we were the oldest parents there. Even though many of the junior class seem to be “youngest children”  Certain Man and I were the oldest working in the kitchen tonight by at least two years.
I think that made me feel even more tired than I was before I realized it.
So it is off to the land of slumber for me.
I am very, very, very, very tired.

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Youngest Son had a birthday this week.  He turned 22 on Cinco de Mayo.  What a ride these years with him have been.  And I am eternally grateful for God’s incredible grace in our lives as a family, and in his life in particular.

This Momma’s heart has had its pensive moments in these last few days — we’ve been dealing with an especially vicious bug.  Youngest Daughter has been sporting a fever of over 103 the last two mornings.  I took her to Dr. Lehman’s office yesterday, and they tested for strep and said she didn’t have it.  They started her on a five day antibiotic.  “Somethings wrong,” they said, comfortingly.  “She will be better soon.  Probably won’t even have fever by morning.”  She really isn’t too much improved yet today, but it has only been 24 hours since she started the medicine.  She had hoped for a full recovery by this morning and when the thermometer read 103.2, the tears were insistent in their attack.  This girlie feels everything entirely too intensely.  I guess it is part of being 17.

Blind Linda’s cough was turning into a bark by yesterday morning, so I trucked her in to Dr. Wilson’s yesterday afternoon, and after checking her over, and diagnosing her with acute sinusitis, he trucked his little wheeley chair over and listened to my lungs and checked out my ears and throat and nose.  The result:  A prescription for both Certain Man and me to try to stamp out this thing that has been hanging around over a week.  The cough is the worst of all.  I get a tickle that just won’t stop, and it feels like I’m going to throw up before I finally get it stopped.

It occurs to me that we are on our final approach to life as we have known it for the nine years since Eldest Daughter got married.  I am happy for our sons, and I am looking forward to having two sweet daughters in love.  I am amazed, though, at how quickly these years have suddenly come to an end.  I am not resentful of the new homes being established, and I have every confidence that these are homes where Jesus will be honored, and that is a good thing in this old sin-crazed world.

But it is both of my sons.  Leaving in the space of eight weeks.  They are so optimistic, so happy, so eager to get on with their lives, and I look at their eyes and see their Daddy’s eyes and remember a young husband who was full of dreams and plans and who worked so hard to bring those dreams to pass.  He has exceeded my wildest expectations.  I’m so thankful for Certain Man and the way he has sacrificed for our lives together as a family.  I pray these sons of ours have learned their lessons well.  They won’t go wrong if they follow his example.  How very much I pray that they will be husbands who lead their families with a sacrificial love.  I pray that they will be the kinds of leaders who will inspire confidence and respect in their wives and families, and that they will never forget the important things about being a family.  That they will work hard, laugh much, love intensely.

And it occurs to me that if they don’t know it by now, a crash course won’t do much good.  Some things just aren’t gotten by emergency education.  So, as I make my way through these last few weeks, planting flowers, making pie crusts, doing normal household things, I keep remembering that my best hope is what has already been taught, and my lifeline to my Heavenly Father who holds the Master Plan for families, and, in fact, already has one in place for them.  I can trust Him for that — He is still the best teacher.  And I need to let go of these young men.  They will make mistakes.  They already have, and they will make some more.  But their hearts are to do this right, and with that, my heart can be at peace.

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It’s a new week and this Monday Morning brings opportunity for Grateful Praise.

Friday, Eldest Son’s Ohio Heart Throb made another safe trip to our fair state.  The weekend went well, and plans continue to be made.  This mother’s heart is grateful for quiet conversations and youthful laughter and young love.  She traveled safely home again last night, even though Eldest Son implored me to “Make her stay!  It’s a matter of National Security!”  (Yes, well.  There’s no logic to love.  Besides, even though there was a time when I could fix almost anything for him, that time is LONG GONE!)

On Saturday, the youth group of our little church got together for a work day.  They redid the nursery at our church.  (There is new carpet, new blinds, new accessories.  They painted the old cribs white, bought new mattresses and crib sheets.   It looks so sweet!)  They pulled weeds and planted flowers and mulched.  Domino’s Pizza has a wonderful special right now — Three or more 10″ pizzas with one topping (besides cheese) for $4.00 each.  The whole group ate pizza for lunch on 32 bucks!  That was pretty amazing!

Also, on Saturday, a batch of bread got made that met my expectations. 
(It is good for a “seasoned” baker to sometimes have glitches in her automatic results. And I think we have a place for the last four loaves of bread that won’t hurt my conscience.  I will tell you about that “after the fact — if I remember.)

Late Saturday night, my Sweet Mama called from Pennsylvania, where my Eldest Brother took her to visit Middle Brother.  I am a Great Auntie again.  Nephew Myron and his lovely wife, Abigail, are celebrating the safe arrival of Sophia Rose.  This is daughter #2 for them.  They have a precocious Isabella Ruth who turned two earlier this month.  This brings the total of great-grands to 14 with one more expected this summer.  When the weddings get over, and the babies get born, by the end of the summer, the Mark Yoder clan will number 70, Lord Willing.  (and if that  www.xanga.com/farmerboy9300 gets on with things, it just might be 71.  Do you hear me, Joe???)

On Sunday, my class of ladies again inspired and blessed me.  I look at their faces, think of the diversity of their lives, am amazed at their strength, often laugh with them at the funny, funny turns the lives of Christian women sometimes take.  And I weep for their heartaches, so close to my own sometimes that I don’t know if I’m crying for them or for me — and sometimes I weep for them and wonder what I would ever do in similar circumstances.  Our Sunday School lesson was on the prayer of Daniel, and the insights offered by the class made me ponder anew the grace available to us to live Godly in a society gone so wrong..

On Sunday Evening, the Greenwood Mennonite School’s High School Chorus gave a program at (what us oldster’s lovingly call) “The Brick Church.”  Acoustics in that place have always been phenomenal, but last night it was not only the acoustics, but The Spirit.  I am partial to one of their singers, not so much because of her musical ability, but because of her heart.  I loved looking at the faces of the people that Youngest Daughter runs around with almost every day, and I thought of how intensely she loves some of them.  I hated it that I couldn’t put a name on every young person in that Chorus, but I appreciated so much the music, how it spoke to my heart of worship and praise and the Hope of Heaven.  It was Holy Ground.  I hear it in my very soul today.

This morning, I got up with that obnoxious cold that I have been able to escape for most of the winter putting a band around my lungs and setting me straight into the bass section of any choir (if I were tempted to join — I’m NOT!).  There were the usual morning things of showers and lunches and laundry and phone calls and morning’s work.  Things are stirring merrily along.  Eldest and Middle Daughter are going to go to Dover to pick up some flowers for my containers and deck boxes and gardens.  I got to see my precious Middle Sister briefly on her way to the dentist.  A beloved Uncle is stopping around with information for a Yoder Family book that is getting updated, and even though I am feeling rather ragged around the edges, my heart is so full of hope and joy that it is hard to feel discouraged.

And this is for you, where ever you are and whatever you are called to do today:

“The eternal God is thy refuge . . .  and underneath are the everlasting arms.”  Deut. 33:27

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31 Years

It has been a contemplative week for Certain Man’s Wife.

31 years
ago on Thursday, there was a tragic accident in the life of our extended
family.  CMW has mentioned before on this blog that her Daddy’s brother, Jesse,
is married to her Sweet Mama’s sister, Gladys.  On that Sunday afternoon in
April, a young girl came around the corner on the wrong side of the road and hit
their volkswagen head on.  Their two sons, Robert, 18, and Joseph, 13, were
killed instantly.

It is funny to me how now, 31 years later, we are finally talking about it
on my mother’s side of the family.  The wreck happened a short distance from our
Wert Grandparents, and in a strange way, it was a blessing that, for most of our
families, we didn’t have to pass the spot in our daily travels.  My family has
been writing about that day.  It started with a posting that was a photo blog of
Robert and Joseph:

Late on the anniversary of their Homegoing,  their mother (and my Sweet
Mama’s) youngest brother posted this to the Wertlink Family Forum:  It was the
first I had heard some of these details, and it affected many of us the same
way.
From Uncle Lloyd Wert:
__,_Things were so cheerful and happy just before the
accident.  Jesse’s had been at the 25th wedding anniversary for Raymond and
Wilma Kauffman and were now back at our home.  We all had been chatting in the
kitchen before they left.  Robert was eager to get back for the evening meeting
at Church if I recall and was pushing to get on the road.  Pop went out with
them to the car to see them off and everyone else stayed in.  Within 5 minutes
of them leaving, we began to hear sirens. Mama immediately started to worry when
the fire trucks and ambulances started arriving towards Cocolamus.  She wanted
us to make sure it wasn’t them. Pop and Mike and Phil drove to the road across
the dam since the road was blocked to the usual Cocolamus route.  As we came in
sight of the dam and looked across the water, Pop said, “That is their car”
which we could see was missing most of the front end.  Fear gripped both of us
as we saw how badly the car was mangled.  We kept driving to the road beyond
Cocolamus and as we attempted to turn left and get to the accident scene, a fire
police stopped us.  When Pop said, “That is my daughter and family in that
accident” and they allowed us through and we stopped just before the accident
and the boys stayed in the car as Pop and I went up to the accident scene.  I
found Jesse sitting on the bank nearby and said “Jesse, how are you?” and he
replied, “Things look really bad.  It doesn’t look good at all.”  He seemed in a
state of shock.  I saw the boys in the front of the car but did not go near, Pop
did. He reached in and touched both of them.  We were told that Gladys had just
left in the ambulance.  We did not know her condition.  I found Naomi and she
was being cared for by several of the ambulance crew and they were working on
her arm.  She was talking a lot out of anxiety and I’m sure fear and shock.  She
introduced me saying, “This is my Uncle Lloyd.”  I talked with her but I don’t
remember what all was said except that she apparently had some insight into
things as she suddenly blurted out, “I don’t think my brothers are alive.”  This
was the day before Naomi turned 11 years old.  When someone asked her age she
said, “I will be 11 tomorrow.”  Pop and I eventually drove back home with the
awful news for Mama and I held her for several minutes, both of us crying.  I
was in a state of disbelief and denial.  I kept saying to Pop that perhaps they
were still alive and he forcefully told me, “Lloyd, they are gone.”   Mike and
Phil were very quiet in the back seat and they both remember this as a most
momentous and somber time in their young lives.  (Mike was almost ten and Phil
was almost seven)  I remember calling people, a most difficult assignment.  I
got through to Paul who had been married to Erma for less than two years.  I now
assume that he was the only one I found at home because I remember talking with
Paul and no one else to convey what had happened.  He said he would be driving
right up and I kept telling him to be careful and not speed.  He must have given
the word to others and I believe others called back later.  Then someone stopped
by to say that one of us had to go back to the accident scene and pick up some
personal items before they towed the car.  As I received the items, they were
placing Joseph and Robert in the back of a carpeted station wagon.  As they
placed Robert, his right arm came across Joseph’ shoulder as if he was
comforting him.  I sobbed the whole way home.  For at least six months and
probably a year, I frequently awoke in the middle of the night with grief and
flashbacks of that scene and of that night. I was 36 years old and surely needed
counseling at that time which I never recognized until I look back on it.  Then
I think of what Jesse and Gladys and family had to face and work through.  And
to this day, this profound loss brings me to tears when I think about it.  I
guess we need to remember that heaven has no room for tears or sorrow or death
and that Robert and Joseph have a peace and comfort we will never know until we
are there with them.    Uncle Lloyd
There were lots of tears —
but a sense of being comforted somehow.  And then more memories began to come
in:
From  the boy’s older sister,
Shirley Miller:
Thank-you so much,
Uncle Lloyd, for taking the time to write out that “first hand” account.  Some
of those details I have never heard.  Even though it made me weep to read it, it
also blessed me, if you can understand what I mean.  One thing I don’t know how
to explain is the “marvelous grace of God” and how it “held and carried” us
during that time, but it was very real.  And family is very precious during a
time of grief like that.  I still remember the comfort received from so many
that really cared.  God has been so good to us.  We don’t deserve His goodness
and yet He is gracious with us anyway.  I hardly know what words to use to say
what I’m feeling….my heart is full.  It has been a day of remembering and
pondering……
~Shirley

CMW
writes:
Dear Uncle
Lloyd,
        I also wept when I read your account.  Daniel and I were in
Plain City.  Uncle Jesse’s son, Jonathan, was boarding with our family for a few
months in preparation for going to Europe with a singing group from Rosedale
Bible Institute, and we were enjoying him immensely.  We were in church at
United Bethel when Mark, Jr. called and asked for Daniel.  He went out to take
the phone call, came back in and got Jonathan and took him out and told him.  At
that point, it seemed as if they were unsure if Uncle Jesse would survive.  He
came back in and got me, told me the news, and I gathered up our children and
headed out to the back.  I don’t remember what I said or how I said it, but I
must not have said it quietly, because, suddenly, there were people at the back
door of the church with us, trying to comfort and sort things out.  There were
no cell phones in those days, and we needed to wait for news, so Jonathan didn’t
immediately leave.  We came home to our house on the little hill, and waited for
the phone calls to go through.  I remember needing music, and putting on
Rosedale Chorale’s album that Shirley and David had sung in — “Oh, Jesus, Grant
Me Hope and Comfort.”  How desperately we needed it then.
 Jonathan gave up his plans to go to Europe.  He left shortly for Delaware.  We started to
put plans together for the same.  The Monday before, a half-starved, desperately
ill baby girl had been placed into our home as a foster child, and when we asked
permission to take her out of state, it was refused.  “We will just place her in
another foster home.  You can take Joseph and Salena, but Christina may not
go.”  We looked at the beautiful little girlie who had started to gain weight
and respond to us and knew that we would never let that happen.  “What in the
world can we do?”  Then Homer and Lena Beachy, substitute grandparents for our
foster babies came and said, “We will take care of the children.  We will come
to your home, and do anything that needs doing.  You GO!”  The State was okay
with that solution, and so we left and drove all night one night, got to the
church in time for the funeral,  spent the rest of the day and left again that
evening to return to Ohio.  Miriam Jantzi rode with us, and one or two others. 
It was such a sad, sad time.  The loss was inestimable.  

From the boys’ brother, Jonathan
Yoder:
Well, thanks to all for sharing your
memories–it has helped to talk about things–even 31 years later.  (Maybe we
did all need counseling)  I was out at Rosedale, staying at Dan and MaryAnn’s,
but I had only been there one week when the accident happened. i think that may
have been the last time I was at church at United Bethel Church in Plain
City.  I saw Dan Yutzy go out, and then he came and got me, and when I got the
news, it seemed all so unreal.  MaryAnn’s recollection of the time is very
accurate, and I flew home to DE the next morning, and then Dawn came with 3
other students from Rosedale in my VW bug as well–David Byler, Doris Schlabach,
and Lois Yoder(my cousin).  I never thought about the fact that a lot of people
missed a lot of school at the time–I guess it never crossed my mind. After the
funeral, I decided to stay home from Europe, where I was scheduled to go with a
choir in June.  I think it was the right thing to do, because at the time we
were not sure how Mama and Papa and Naomi were going to do, but I never have
made it to Europe.  But things happen for the best, and I believe it was part of
God’s plan.
 
      Jonathan
Another brother, David Yoder:
I too want to thank you, Uncle Lloyd others for taking time to
recount the memories of the night Robert and Joseph were killed. As I read
through the accounts I couldn’t help but weep and recall the kindness of so many
people over that time. God bless you
all!

Dave 
 

From Aunt Orpha
Gingerich:
I will share a few
memories of that eve. Marie and I had gone up home for a short visit before
Jesse’s left, and we were talking a bit when the ambulances started screaming,
Marie and I started for home and Marie thought we should go to Cocolamus to see
if we could be of any help.  I know sometimes they don’t want people crowding
around, so we went on home.  We told Lloyd and he suggested maybe it was
Jesse’s.  “No” I said, “they are long gone”.  But Lloyd said “Still till they
would  call the ambulances it could be them”. So I tried to call Papa and Mama
but their line was busy, so I called Aunt Gladys and she said it was Jesse’s and
the boys were dead.  I started sobbing out loud till I said, “but they were
ready to go” . Lloyd and I got ready and went up to the hospital.  When we got
there they were wheeling Gladys out from somewhere and they were working on
Naomi.  But they were very concerned about Jesse.  The fluid was filling up his
lungs and they said there isn’t much they can do for that.  They said they were
sending him to Hershey but when the fluid starts up across the lungs there
really isn’t much to do. So they called the ambulance and they left Jesse talk a
little to Gladys. But the police interfered and started questioning. About  that
time, the word went out to the churches all around the country, and till Jesse
got to Hershey he was better.  I really felt it was the prayers of God’s people
that saved Jesse’s life.  When we were leaving the ICU, one of the nurses
followed us an said
 how
different it was from the usual reactions to an experience like that.  She said
it seemed like a presence was there.
      The evening before the
funeral, I was alone outside the ICU unit waiting to go in to see Gladys, and I
told GOD “somebody goofed, If they had gone a minute or two earlier, or a minute
or two later they would never have met on that curve”.  I pulled my Living New
Testament out of my pocket book and it fell open to Col 2:10 “AND HE IS THE
HIGHEST RULER OVER EVERY OTHER POWER”.  so that quieted the turmoil in my mind.
Though we can’t understand it, it was under His control.
     Lloyd and I didn’t get
to the funeral, He went to Hershey to be with Jesse and I went to Gladys . .
.
      As I think back, I have
memories of our family being drawn together.  But we would ask that  it would
not be an experience like that to bond us together.  Naomi was discharged before
Gladys and was here a week or two.  It was a privileged to have her with us
during that time.    Orpha

CMW’s brother, Mark Yoder, Jr.

It’s amazing how details of major events can
actually become confused in our minds over the years.  In my memory, I had
gotten Dad’s permission to stay home the night of the accident.  That was quite
unusual for Dad to give his blessing to stay away from a Sunday night service,
but for some reason he had agreed to it this time.  In my memory, I was home
reading when Uncle Lloyd called and said that there was an accident and Robert
and Joseph were killed.  Uncle Lloyd was so overcome with emotion and tears that
he handed the phone to Grandpa, who confirmed that the boys were indeed gone.  I
kept saying over and over “Are you sure?  Are you absolutely sure?”  I simply
could not believe it and didn’t want to believe it.  And I didn’t want to start
calling people and then find out there was a mistake. If I recall right, I
called Greenwood and asked for Dad and shared the sketchy information that I
had.  Things were unknown at that point as to how things would end up for the
others in the accident.  I do remember having that “surreal” feeling, that this
was a dream and that I’d wake up and it wouldn’t be true.  If only it could have
been a dream!

Another thing i remember is that was the week I was mowing
a lot of rye for haylege and spent a lot of time out in the field on the tractor
doing hay.   To this day when the farmers begin mowing hay in the Spring, I
think of Robert and Joseph and often wonder how life would have been different
without “the accident.” – Mark Yoder, Jr.” 

From Aunt Freda Zehr: 
I was thinking as I read all
of the posts about that dreadful time in our
lives, and especially in Gladys
and Jesse’s, lives,
how that thirty-one years have passed and this is the
first, at least that I
have known
about, that we are all able to talk and
to share our feelings about it.
I think this is the right time, I think that
it has been long enough that
we can all look back and see Gods hand in it
all. Not that one can ever look
back without pain and hurt and questions and
wonderings, but that
as time goes by one can see how God used it to
strengthen many peoples faith.

Reading everyone’s report, I realize thatI had forgotten many
things–for instance that Lloyd G was with Jesse during the
funeral and Orpha was with Gladys. This whole discussion has felt
like putting the pieces of a puzzle together for me. And now just
reading Orpha’s story of how the nurses said the reaction was different,
starts to adds more pieces of the puzzle–the puzzle of what good could ever
come of two wonderful boys losing their life at such a young age.
But it only starts, I am sure that puzzle will only be finished when
we all get to Heaven. For myself it has been healing and good to have shared these stories,
as painful as they are. love and prayers, Freda

And then, Uncle Jesse’s note
put a special touch to the discussion:

Thank you so much,
Uncle Lloyd, for taking time to write out your memories of that sad moment in
time. Your comments are healing, even while the tears come. Freda tells of her
response, and I know that all of us remember the news of Allen and Ruth Ann’s
accident which took the precious life of Jennifer
. (Buckeyegirlie’s
edit:  Another Aunt and Uncle, Allen and Ruth Ann Shirk, had an accident in
1969, also close to my grandparent’s house, and their oldest child, 6 week old
Jennifer, was killed.)
  I have wondered  why both accidents took
place so close to home?? Grandpa and Grandma Wert were ‘towers’ of strength
during those times of grief and sadness! That meant so much to us. Gladys and I
were looking at pictures and thinking back—–You spoke of counseling, Lloyd,
and I wonder how that would have helped us as a family, had it been available?
Gladys has spoken numerous times about not being at the funeral of Robert and
Joseph—would that have made a major difference for us? I believe it would have
been helpful for her. I believe mothers are affected differently than any other
person involved.
Even though it has been long since those events
affected us as a family, it means so much to know that we are remembered! You
all are very special to us! Lots of love,
J&G

In a world of loss and broken dreams and disappointment — sometimes with the people we love, sometimes with the people who love us, and sometimes, even, God, I think of the perspective 31 years gives us.  As a parent, I must say that the example that Uncle Jesse and Aunt Gladys have left for us has given me courage and hope and deepened my faith in a God who knows our tomorrows but cries with us today.

And the incredible reality of having someone we love safely home is still the greatest comfort of all.

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We’ve been gone.  I guess that is probably pretty obvious, isn’t it?  Certain
Man and I made quite a trip over the weekend.  I just love going away with him
all by ourselves and it was a really special weekend.

First, we left on
Thursday morning, and went to Holmes County, Ohio, to meet the parents of Oldest
Son’s Ohio Heart Throb.  That was a really special time, and we had a great
supper, and it was relaxed and happy and just plain fun.  We got to see Regina
in the setting of her home, and it was a blessing to us.

Yet that night,
we went down to Plain City.  Certain Man has a cousin who lives just a few
streets over from his parents on a quiet little cul de sac, and they had said we
could stay at their house for the nights whilst a ” Family Maintenance Weekend”
was happening.  Certain Man’s sister, Lena, and his sister, Rachel, and her
husband, Ivan Zehr, came to pitch in and take care of some things there.  They
got lots and lots done, too.  I did some things, but mostly, I cooked and ran
errands.  The weekend wasn’t long enough, and my heart aches for this family. 
It is obvious that these two old people won’t be able to stay alone much longer,
but I honestly don’t know what to do.  And you know what, it isn’t really my
problem.  However, the others don’t know what to do either.

We left there
early yesterday morning, and traveled to Denver, PA where Certain Man was taking
the suit for our son’s weddings to have it altered.  Then we stopped to visit
some dear, dear friends who live out in the boonies of Denver, PA.  What a great
time that was, too.  Bev Martin and her family are old friends of ours from
before we moved to Delaware.  So it was really, really sweet to spend some time
with her.  Her mother fed us some delicious homemade vegetable beef stew that
really hit the spot, but along about five thirty, when we were starting to
leave, I developed a really sharp pain in the upper right part of my abdomen,
and it gave me fits until after I got home.  I took some strong pain medicine,
and then went to sleep.  Thjis morning it felt wonderful, and I was really
tickled to have it gone.  This afternoon, Certain Man grilled me a very small,
but perfect Filet Mignon steak, seasoned perfectly, and just perfect in every
way.  Within an hour, I was feeling so bad that I wondered if I didn’t need to
go to the emergency room.  I kept thinking, “Well, I need to finish this yet,”
or that it just wasn’t the right time to leave.  Thbis evening, it was really
hurting, so I looked it up in one of my medical books, and I am pretty sure that
it is a gall bladder attack of some sort or other.  I took a very strong pain
pill tonight, and it is much, much better.  Of course, I am so sleepy I hardly
know what end is up, and I keep making stupid mistakes on here, but I guess I
need to schedule some sort of upper G.I.series and see what is going on before I
get myself into a real quandary and an emergency.

I came home to a wonderful surprise.  Eldest Daughter and Middle Daughter, in a conspiracy with Certain Man, arranged to have my downstairs bathroom redone.  They took out the wall paper that was there when we moved here 19 years ago, and had a painter come in and paint it all.  Including the ceiling!  WOW!!!  What a difference!!!  They even got one of the new handicapped toilets and had it installed, and that is really a blessing.  They painted the whole thing white, so it will need some decorative touches, but not too much.  Stop by and see it if you get a chance. I am so pleased with it.

Oh, yes!  I took my bread along
to Ohio.  By the time I got it there, it hardly smelled bad at all.  Of course, they
all ate it happily.  However, that isn’t too much comfort, as Daniel’s Mom
cannot really smell, and neither does his oldest sister.  However, while I was
out there, I talked to Middle Daughter.  She had cooked a chicken, and decided
that she was going to buy some bread at the grocery store.
    Said Eldest
Son, “Will You PLEASE use the store bought bread for my lunch tomorrow?  This
bread of Mom’s is so bad that I cannot ever taste what is in my sandwich when it
is made from that bread.”  So they have eaten most of that loaf of store bread,
and there are still the four or five loaves of the “donut bread” in the freezer.  I’m thinking seasoned
bread crumbs or croutons or something similar.  I know that I cannot
conscientiously throw it away, and everyone keeps telling me that it isn’t that
bad — but when I opened the loaf here on the counter tonight, I could still
tell it as bad as ever, at least to my nostrils. 

But it is time to
speak of other things.  I have some gorgeous old pictures from several years ago
of the yard in Spring at Shady Acres, and things are very bit as pretty.now as
they were then.  I actually did plant my “arc” of Geraniums tonight, and I am
hoping they don’t freeze.  I am really anxious to get my flowers
planted.

One other thing.  Some of you know that I have been on Weight
Watchers since the end of January,   I came home with my “losses” pretty much
intact.  The last weigh-in that I had at Weight Watchers was a week ago and at
that time, I was .4 (Four tenths) of a pound nigh unto losing 30 pounds.  I feel
such a difference, and I enjoy their program very much.  I know it is not for
everyone, but things seem to have changed drastically since the late ’70’s when
I was looking for something similar to this program, and the changes are things
that make it a whole lot easier to learn.  I have some really great
“cheerleaders,” too, and that helps me so much.

And now, Certain Man has
climbed the “mountain” to bed, and I need to go, too.

Thanks for all
your comments.  My Xanga friends are an incredible blessing to me.

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